noun: gratitude
the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

24th of March, 2015 NYC

I spent good part of my brain storming hours debating between commitment to write or commitment to my body as a temple.
First things first.
I come from humble origins.
I don’t need the latest model, just a functioning one.
I don’t need the most expensive brand.
I do however, care for quality, finishing, and pleasantry.Thanks to the artist in me.
The artist in me doesn’t mind the simplest kind, but is deeply stressed by broken, stained or croocked.

Today, when the artist in me was just about to bitch at mine “of the simplest” kind blinds, it hit me that the three segments wich brought all this disharmony into the day were bent by then eleven years old Rachel, and my heart smiles.
They got bent. So what?
Now, they are a reminder of a person I love. Of her visit from Brasil a little while a go, and of all the joy I experienced holsting her and taking her around.

How did I become so grumpy?
In my teens, after experiencing the pain of loss for the first time I became very defensive, as a self preservation mechanism.
I chose to focus on people’s faults reather than on their qualities in order to not get atacched to them.
I held on to this mechanism so tightly that it became a permanent thing.
Boy, it made me miss out on so much.

My parents taugth us to only- if at all- compare ourselves to people less fortunate than us.
That we would eventually realize how blessed we were. So true.
Their advice, alongside with the character Pollyanna’s “glad game” always helped me to deal with frustations and adversities.
Involved  with “not looking into myself” I didn’t realize it got lost over the years.
Now that I do, I intend to find it.
Therefore, I choose to commit to gratitude today.
It’s a no brainer. If one stars listing motives to curse and to thank, the motives of the latest would never stop popping up to mind, while the others would just
pop up ever more scarcely, if not ceasing all together.
Even because if you are thankful for what you have you take a better care of it, you don’t take it for granted, you don’t lose it.

My first action as “commited to gratitude” was to star a little project -suggested by my mom on Thanksgiving*- up.

In a cool pig bank, fancy box or even in an empty Crown Royal sack **, place a piece of paper where you gave thanks to something. Everyday, during a whole year until Thanksgiving.
Supposedly it’s mind blowing  how blessed your life is.
I am thankfully doing it.
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, or more.
It turns denial into acceptance.
Chaos to order.Confusion to clarity.
It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home,
a stranger into a friend.”
Melody Beatti

“As we express our gratitude,
we most never forget that
the highest appreciation
is not to utter words,
but to live by them.” J.F.K


*Sorry mom.To quit procrastination will be one of my commitments at some point. ❤
**like in my case 😉